All text will now be saved to the script file. Type UNSCRIPT at any time to discontinue scripting. >restart Are you sure you want to start over? (YES or NO) > y Episode in the Life of an Artist Copyright 2003 by Peter Eastman Alexander Pope once said, "A little learning is a dangerous thing." I don't know what he meant by that. I've always thought learning was a good thing. Without it, you end up in some boring job that you hate. Maybe he was one of those Communists who wanted to give opium to the masses so they wouldn't notice they were bored and there was nothing to watch on TV. No, wait a minute... the Communists were against the Pope. Well, whatever. It's time to go to work. Bedroom, on the bed I'm lying in bed. It's warm and cosy here. In fact, this would be a really nice place to stay if there weren't an alarm clock going off across the room. >get up Okay, I'm no longer on the bed. The alarm clock is buzzing loudly. >hit alarm clock What do you want to attack it with? >hand I don't know the word "hand". >turn off clock I turn off the alarm clock, and the buzzing stops. "The rest is silence." Shakespeare. >i I am empty-handed. >x me "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Well I think I look pretty good. >l Bedroom This is my bedroom - a great place to come back to at the end of the day. A doorway leads west into the hallway. The dresser stands against one wall, and the bed on the opposite side. There's also a closet, an alarm clock on top of the dresser, a large pile of dirty clothes on the floor (hey, it's still a couple of weeks till my laundry day!), and a life-sized cutout of Leonard Nimoy. What can I say? It's home! >x closet The closet is closed. >open it Opening the closet reveals a clean shirt and a pair of shoes. >wear shirt (First taking the clean shirt) Taken. Okay, I'm now wearing the clean shirt. >wear shoes I think the shoes would be a lot more comfortable if I put socks on first. >open dresser The dresser contains an assortment of clean clothing, ready to wear. >wear socks I don't see any socks here. >get clothing Which clothing do you mean, the dirty clothes, or the clean clothes? >clean I look through the drawers of the dresser, and pull out some clean clothing to wear: socks, underwear, and a pair of pants. >i I have a clean shirt (being worn), clean pants, clean socks, and clean underwear. >wear underwear Okay, I'm now wearing the clean underwear. >wear pants Okay, I'm now wearing the clean pants. >wear socks Okay, I'm now wearing the clean socks. >wear shoes (First taking the pair of shoes) Taken. Okay, I'm now wearing the pair of shoes. >[I can't believe I'm typing this.] I don't understand the punctuation "[". >l Bedroom This is my bedroom - a great place to come back to at the end of the day. A doorway leads west into the hallway. The dresser stands against one wall, and the bed on the opposite side. There's also a closet, an alarm clock on top of the dresser, a large pile of dirty clothes on the floor (hey, it's still a couple of weeks till my laundry day!), and a life-sized cutout of Leonard Nimoy. What can I say? It's home! The dresser seems to contain clean clothes. >x floor It lies beneath you. >x alarm clock Without this, I don't know how I'd ever get up in the morning. Thankfully, it's now quiet. >x time I don't know the word "time". >w Hallway This is a short hallway between my bedroom (to the east) and living room (to the west). The bathroom is north. >n Bathroom My bathroom. I really need to clean in here. It's pretty small as bathrooms go: just a sink, toilet, and shower. A cupboard is mounted on one wall. The doorway faces south. >open cupboard Opening the cupboard reveals a towel. >get towel Taken. >s Hallway >w Living Room/Kitchen/Dining Room This is the main living area of my apartment, a sort of combined living room, dining room, and kitchen. Furniture includes a table, several chairs, and a very comfy sofa. There's also a refrigerator, a stove, and a TV. The hallway is to the west, and the front door is south. Sitting on the stove is a frying pan. >verbose Okay, now in VERBOSE mode. Living Room/Kitchen/Dining Room This is the main living area of my apartment, a sort of combined living room, dining room, and kitchen. Furniture includes a table, several chairs, and a very comfy sofa. There's also a refrigerator, a stove, and a TV. The hallway is to the west, and the front door is south. Sitting on the stove is a frying pan. >[dude, are you going to make me go through this mundanity?] I don't understand the punctuation "[". >s I'd really like to eat breakfast before I go to work... >open fridge Opening the refrigerator reveals a carton of milk, a carton of orange juice, two eggs, and some bacon. >drink milk "For he on honeydew hath fed, and drunk the milk of paradise!" Samuel Taylor Coleridge. I don't have any honeydew melon, and there's probably better milk than this in paradise, but it's still pretty good. I drink a couple of swallows, then close up the carton again. >drink juice I take a swig of juice from the carton. Tasty, and full of Vitamin C! >s I'd really like to eat breakfast before I go to work... >fry bacon I don't know the word "fry". >get bacon Taken. >put it on pan There's no good surface on the frying pan. >put it in pan Done. >turn on pan I don't know how to turn the frying pan on. >turn on stove Okay, it's now turned on. The strips of bacon sizzle and turn crispy. >eat bacon Just as I'm about to start eating, I glance at the clock and notice that the bus will be here in three minutes. No time to eat now! I grab a pop-tart to eat on the bus instead. >[good lord] I don't understand the punctuation "[". >s Just as I'm walking up to the door, I see the bus coming down the street. I grab my wallet, keys, and watch from the ledge by the door, throw on my coat, and dash outside as the bus is rolling up. I climb the steps, drop my money into the change-taking-machine (it makes a neat clinking noise as the coins roll down the slide), and take a seat near the front of the bus. On The Bus I'm sitting on the bus, about four rows back. It's fairly crowded - lots of people going to work. Outside the window, I can see the city rolling past. >i I have a clean shirt (being worn), clean pants (being worn), clean socks (being worn), clean underwear (being worn), a pair of shoes (being worn), a towel, a pop-tart, a coat (being worn), a wristwatch (being worn), a wallet, and keys. The coat pocket seems to contain a book of famous quotations. >eat pop-tart That was delicious! And it's a good source of 7 vitamins and minerals! A woman starts to sit down next to me, but immediately stands up again and moves to another row, wrinkling her nose and sniffing loudly. Perhaps I should have taken a shower... >z Time passes... Darn it. I really should have turned off the stove before I left. And closed the refrigerator. Oh well... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... An old man in a battered raincoat sits down next to me. He has a chicken sitting on his head. >z Time passes... >x chicken The chicken is watching me in a way that makes me kind of uncomfortable. It's like she knows something that I don't. >get chicken The chicken gives me an ominous glance as if to say, "Don't even think about it." The old man sighs. "It grieves me to see the changes taking place in this town," he remarks. It sounds like he's trying to start a conversation. It always weirds me out a bit when strangers do that. >talk to man What do you want to ask him about? >chicken "Dharmawati is resting at present. Perhaps in a little while she will feel ready to perform." >hit chicken What do you want to attack it with? >all You can't use multiple indirect objects. >x man It's hard to tell exactly how old he is. 60? 70? His hair is very gray, but somehow I get the feeling he could outrun me in a race without even trying. His clothes are old and somewhat battered, like he might have been sleeping out on the street. And the chicken on his head... sorry, but that's just plain weird. >z Time passes... >i I have a clean shirt (being worn), clean pants (being worn), clean socks (being worn), clean underwear (being worn), a pair of shoes (being worn), a towel, a coat (being worn), a wristwatch (being worn), a wallet, and keys. The coat pocket seems to contain a book of famous quotations. >get up I'm already standing! >out I can't go that way. >s I can't go that way. >out I can't go that way. >read book I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Oscar Wilde: "In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Andy Warhol: "In the future everyone will be world-famous for fifteen minutes." The bus reaches my stop. The man with the chicken on his head stands up to let me out. As I squeeze past him, I feel him press something into my palm. I start to raise my hand to see what it is, but he stops me and shakes his head. The chicken watches me as I leave the bus. All the way off, I can feel her eyes on the back of my neck. Only when I'm standing on the sidewalk and the bus is pulling away do I look down to see what he has given me. It's a tiny flashlight, meant to go on a keychain. What on earth...? I look back to the bus, but it's already halfway down the block, and I can't see anything through the windows. All I can think of is a quote by Samuel Beckett: "He brings light, as only the great dare to bring light, to the issueless predicament of existence." I head on into the factory. It's just a few minutes till starting time, so there are lots of other people arriving, punching timecards and heading to their stations. I still feel a bit weirded out by that guy on the bus, and the chicken on his head, and him giving me this flashlight like it was some big secret. I take a deep breath as I step out onto the factory floor. Everything's normal here, just like it always has been. I wave to some of the other guys as I walk past them toward my station, at the very start of the assembly line. It's good to be home. >x flashlight It's a miniature flashlight, designed to go on a keychain. It is currently turned off. >turn it on I turn on the flashlight and wiggle it back and forth, making neat spiral patterns on the walls. Cool! No point wasting the battery, though, so I turn it off again. >l Factory Main Floor I'm standing at my station on the assembly line. A conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and travels west down the middle of the room. A bell rings loudly. With a clanking sound, the conveyor belt comes to life. >x belt The conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and continues down the middle of the room. It is currently moving. With a quiet clop!, a green widget appears out of a chute in the wall and lands in front of me, just to the side of the conveyor belt. >get widget Taken. Clop! A red wodget appears out of the chute and lands beside the widget. >put widget on wodget I fit the square peg of the green widget into the square hole of the red wodget. They snap together with a satisfying click! to form a perfect red-green widget-wodget complex, all ready to put on the conveyor belt for transport on to parts unknown! God, I love my job! >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >l Factory Main Floor I'm standing at my station on the assembly line. A conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and travels west down the middle of the room. >x belt The conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and continues down the middle of the room. It is currently moving. >i I have a clean shirt (being worn), clean pants (being worn), clean socks (being worn), clean underwear (being worn), a pair of shoes (being worn), a towel, a coat (being worn), a wristwatch (being worn), a wallet, keys, a flashlight, and a widget-wodget complex. The coat pocket seems to contain a book of famous quotations. >read book I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Robert Louis Stevenson: "Man is a creature who lives not upon bread alone but principally by catchwords." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Gertrude Stein: "What was the use of my having come from Oakland it was not natural to have come from there yes write about if I like or anything if I like but not there, there is no there there." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Moliere: "Anyone may be an honorable man, and yet write verse badly." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Oscar Wilde: "In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Andy Warhol: "In the future everyone will be world-famous for fifteen minutes." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Robert Louis Stevenson: "Man is a creature who lives not upon bread alone but principally by catchwords." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Gertrude Stein: "What was the use of my having come from Oakland it was not natural to have come from there yes write about if I like or anything if I like but not there, there is no there there." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Moliere: "Anyone may be an honorable man, and yet write verse badly." >g I flip through the book of quotations and pick one at random. Oscar Wilde: "In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." >l Factory Main Floor I'm standing at my station on the assembly line. A conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and travels west down the middle of the room. >i I have a clean shirt (being worn), clean pants (being worn), clean socks (being worn), clean underwear (being worn), a pair of shoes (being worn), a towel, a coat (being worn), a wristwatch (being worn), a wallet, keys, a flashlight, and a widget-wodget complex. The coat pocket seems to contain a book of famous quotations. >x wallet This was a birthday present a couple of years ago. It's a fairly ordinary leather wallet. >open it In the wallet I see a driver's license and a five zorkmid bill. >[zorkmid?] I don't understand the punctuation "[". >x watch One of my proudest possessions. This wristwatch is water-proof, shock-proof, and heat-proof, with alarm, stopwatch, countdown timer, memory for 24 phone numbers, and built in compass and thermometer. I don't usually care about knowing the time that much, but it sure looks cool. >x compass I don't know the word "compass". >x keys These are the keys to my house. >put flashlight on keys There's no good surface on the keys. >put flashlight on keychain I don't know the word "keychain". >z Time passes... >l Factory Main Floor I'm standing at my station on the assembly line. A conveyor belt comes out of the wall to the east, and travels west down the middle of the room. >e I can't go that way. >n I can't go that way. >w I can't leave my station right now. There's work to do! >work I don't know the word "work". >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >z Time passes... >[dude, this is so dumb.] I don't understand the punctuation "[". >quit In a total of 95 turns, you have achieved a score of 0 points out of a possible 100. Do you really want to quit? (YES or NO) > y